Question 1

What can couples therapy help with?

Accepted Answer

Couples therapy can help with recurring conflict, communication difficulties, emotional distance, trust concerns, life transitions, differences in needs or expectations, and feeling disconnected from one another.It can also support couples who want to strengthen their relationship, deepen connection, or prepare for important milestones such as engagement or marriage. Premarital counseling may include exploring shared values, expectations, areas of alignment and difference, and the kind of relationship you want to build together.

Question 2

Do we need to be in crisis to start couples therapy?

Accepted Answer

No. Some couples begin therapy during a particularly difficult period, while others come in because they have noticed patterns they want to address before they become more entrenched. Therapy can also be helpful when the relationship is generally strong and you want to become more intentional about how you communicate, navigate differences, and stay connected over time.

Question 3

What happens during a couples therapy session?

Accepted Answer

Sessions usually focus on understanding what is happening between you and the patterns that tend to emerge during conflict, disconnection, or other difficult moments. We may explore each partner’s perspective, help you communicate more clearly, and work toward greater understanding and connection. Depending on your needs, sessions may include both deeper emotional exploration and practical strategies you can use outside of therapy.

Question 4

What if we keep having the same arguments?

Accepted Answer

Repeating the same argument is often a sign that there is an underlying pattern that has not yet been fully understood or resolved. Rather than focusing only on the topic of the argument, we may look at what happens between you during those moments, what each of you is reacting to, and what may be needed to help the interaction unfold differently.

Question 5

What if one of us is more ready for couples therapy than the other?

Accepted Answer

It is common for partners to come to therapy with different levels of readiness, hope, or uncertainty about the process. I typically speak with each partner individually during the initial phone consultation and meet with each of you for an individual intake session at the beginning of treatment. This gives me a chance to better understand each person’s perspective, including any concerns or reservations about couples therapy, and helps us develop a shared sense of what you hope to work on together. I may also use individual sessions at different points in couples therapy when helpful to better understand something that may be difficult to explore fully in the joint sessions and to support the work we are doing together as a couple.

Question 6

Will you take sides?

Accepted Answer

My role is not to determine who is right or wrong, but to understand each partner’s experience and what is happening between you. I work to create a space where both of you can feel heard and understood, while also helping you recognize the patterns and interactions that may be contributing to disconnection or conflict. When needed, I may offer observations or draw attention to patterns or behaviors that may be getting in the way of greater understanding, accountability, and connection.

Question 7

Can couples therapy help us decide whether to stay together?

Accepted Answer

Yes. Some couples come to therapy feeling uncertain about the future of their relationship. Therapy can provide a structured space to better understand what has led to that uncertainty, what each partner wants, and whether there is a path toward repair. When separation is the direction a couple chooses, therapy can also support a more thoughtful transition into the next stage—helping partners make sense of their experience together, navigate the emotional and practical aspects of separation, and move forward with greater clarity about themselves, their needs, and the patterns they want to carry forward or change in future relationships.

Question 8

Do you work with couples who are dating, engaged, or preparing for marriage?

Accepted Answer

Yes. Couples therapy can be helpful at many stages of a relationship, including dating, engagement, marriage, or long-term partnership. Premarital work may focus on communication, expectations, values, family and cultural differences, finances, intimacy, conflict, and the kind of relationship you want to build together.

Question 9

How long does couples therapy usually last?

Accepted Answer

The length of couples therapy depends on what brings you in and what you hope to work toward together. Some couples come in for focused work around a specific concern, while others benefit from a longer process when the patterns are more longstanding or complex. I regularly revisit our goals and progress so that we can consider together what continues to feel useful in therapy.

Question 10

Do you offer both in-person and virtual couples therapy?

Accepted Answer

Yes. I offer both in-person and virtual couples therapy. The format can be flexible depending on your schedules, preferences, and what feels most helpful for the work.

Couples Therapy

Common Questions You May Have